My Blood Go Upstairs

I have very distinct physical signs when I’m stressed. One, my insomnia gets even worse… and two, my face breaks out like a young boy who just entered puberty.

I have been sleeping relatively well… any lack of sleep nowadays is really due to the fact that I’ve been very busy… What can I say, I’m popular… (I was going to say something corny like “everybody wants a piece of the Syam-ster”... but I have my standards when writing…)

My face however is a different story… ok, the condition isn’t that bad… it’s just the one zit… but it’s still annoying…

See, here’s the problem… I’m breaking out because I’m stressed… I know that because I’m definitely antsy… But I don’t know why I’m stressed! I’ve been trying to figure it out for the past week. I haven’t been writing for the past week because my mind’s occupied with trying to figure out why I’m stressed. Does this make sense to you?

Let’s go over what may be stressing me out…

First of all, I’m back in KL, and I don’t think I’ve been happier in the past 2 years… things are definitely different from the way I left it, but definitely different in a good way…

Second, I examined my work life… I’ve been getting more responsibilities at work, but I look at that as compliment from my boss. I’ve always felt that when your boss gives you more work and responsibilities, it’s his/her way of saying that ‘your work is excellent and you are trustworthy, so I entrust this new responsibility on you’. So, I would say that my career is on great path…

Personal life… well, who are we kidding… who wouldn’t love me? I do feel like I’m surrounded by people who love and care for me… I don’t feel anybody is hurting me in any way… I may get a bit stressed trying to slot everybody in… as they say, ‘everybody wants a piece of the Syam-ster’… (yeah, there’s no real quality to this writing)…

So what’s bugging me? My friends have suggested that I’m getting stressed out because I have no idea what’s stressing me out. With my slight OCD, that is just possible…

Relieving stress is not something I’m really good at. I’m the type that keeps things bottled up (though this time, I have no idea what’s in the bottle). I get all sorts of advice from people on how to relieve the pressure… they range from the obvious “turn to God”, to the absolutely insane “drop everything and move to a different country”… to tell you the truth, the latter seems to be a very interesting idea… but I’ll just get stressed with the planning…

Maybe I should just look at the great things happening in my life nowadays… I should be thankful for all that has gone right for me… those things would definitely dwarf all those things that are stressing me out, even the imaginary ones.

Back To Basics

I thought this time, I would try things a little differently with my blog. Instead of embracing technology and typing things up, I've decided to do things the old fashioned way... with pen and paper.

God, my handwriting is awful!

You see, back in 'my day', that's how we did things in school. I first learned creative writing with a pen and several pieces of paper. You didn't type up a single thing. There were editing marks all over your first draft, in a different coloured ink. Your final draft was still handwritten, but had to be in your best handwriting.

Things were much simpler then... everything in life was new, hence it amused and inspired me to write. You didn't think about political correctness or worry about offending anyone because all your thoughts were... well... as corny as it sounds, pure and innocent.

Enough with the flashbacks... back to the present.

It's not that there's nothing happening around me that inspires me to write anymore... there's lots of things. Lies, political maneuvering, backstabbing, anger... and that's just during my drive to work. By the time I picked up my pen just now, I've experienced more events than a soap opera. Problem is, there's nothing positive that really stood out.

Adult life seems to get more complicated with every waking moment. You deal with problems, only taking the rare five minute break to come up for air. Little amusing events are scarce.

Have you noticed that if you hear a funny joke at work, you get excited when you get home and tell the joke to your loved ones? You start off with "I heard this joke today..." Do you realise that the highlight of your entire day was ONE joke? This is such a contract to when you were a kid... you come home from school and won't stop talking for two hours about what you did that day...

No wonder kids say that adults are boring...

There are several methods out there that's supposed to keep you from going insane. The first being "work hard, play hard"... In other words, work like mad during office hours (and then some), then party like mad afterwards. Do you know how much 'partying' I have to do to totally erase the events of the day from my mind? (That was meant to be a rhetorical question, though in the past, I have tried to quantify it... the closest answer I ever got was "WTF!?")

Second theory is to do something you love. There's a problem with that... let's use an example of a tennis player named 'Andre'. Obviously, Andre loves to play tennis. But then, to remain on form, he has to train non stop. I don't know about you, but if HAD to do something I love for eight hours a day, six days a week, I would go nuts. After all this training, Andre has to cope with the pressures of winning his matches... not to mention bad calls by the line judge.

So here's my theory... work and play at the same time. Keep the workplace alive. Joke around while you work. LAUGH!! Some people do not agree with this method, citing low productivity as a result. But how much productivity could you achieve if your staff is busing bitching about the work? Make the workplace as fun and enjoyable as school was (I'm referring to the early primary years... not the exam driven rest of the school life).

Life doesn't have to be complicated or frustrating or every bad adjective you can think of. When face with troubles of adult life, go back to basics - be a kid.