Hard to Say Goodbye to Yesterday

There are some friendships that lasts the test of time. I’ve got friends who I’ve known and hung out with for 14 and even 16 years… and I moved around a lot when I was younger, so that’s quite an accomplishment.

A test of this type of friendship is distance. You lose contact easily if you can’t meet up for a coffee once a week. If the separation is temporary, then it’s easier to reconnect.

I had to go through that when I was staying in Penang for 19 months… friends did call, text, email, IM, etc whenever they had an event they wanted me to attend such as birthday parties, weddings, etc… I did move my travelling schedule around in order to accommodate as many of these events as possible, but I did miss out on a lot.

Of course technology helps us keep in touch… social networks like Facebook lets you keep abreast of all the happenings back home… but seriously, how much bonding could you do from helping out on your friend’s farm? (for those who don’t understand that last part, I’m talking about Farmville… check it out, you’ll be hooked and you’ll hate me for it!)

Fortunately for me, when I came back, it seems that I can pick up where I left off… I guess the friendships I formed here in KL could survive the distance…

It’s now a test for the friendships I’ve formed during my time in Penang. These were close friends that kept me sane during my time alone there, away from home. So far, I feel like those friendships are holding their own… whenever I call my friends there, it seems that we continue talking like nothing has happened and the distance is not there…

However, I have to admit that the friendships there are going to be tested with the fact that it’s going to be a very long time before we hang out together again. I don’t see myself going to Penang in the near future (or even the far future… is that even a proper term?). They all have their lives in Penang and I have mine in KL…

So now you have to accept the new dynamics of the friendship. You have to understand that there will be a big gap, but you will still stay connected. Things obviously won’t be the same… no more hanging out together after work or on weekends… no more going to lunch together and complaining how you’ve run out of places to go to for lunch… no more 4pm cigarette breaks (the management of “Yet Another Decade” would like to state that we do not condone smoking… it does not make you look cool… does not help you make friends and fit in… and does not do whatever great things the ads claim they do…)

Accepting the hard facts would be tough at first… I’ll be lying if I said I wasn’t sad to leave my friends in Penang, knowing things were going to change… that last night I was there was a somber occasion as we hung out for the last time… and how often do you see a bunch of guys who formed a band and play rock songs, hug each other and promise to keep in touch and make an effort to visit each other? (Why do I have a feeling my band is going to disown me?)

Missing your faraway friends is not always a bad thing… yes, you’ll get depressed and start reminiscing about the ‘good ole times’… but it shows that the friendship is still alive, and when the opportunity arises and you meet up again, you’ll be able to pick up where you left off…

PS : I would like to wish my good friend Keiko Goto the best of luck in her future endeavors back in Japan. You’ve been a great colleague and a great friend and I’m sure I speak for all of us here when I say that we will definitely miss you.