Doormat

My son just started kindergarten this year. So he’s beginning to learn how to read. The other day, he was doing his homework and reading it out loud. It was a page of words with the picture depicting the word. So it went a little like this:

C-A-T…. cat
B-A-T…. bat
M-A-T.... alas kaki

You see, there was a picture of a doormat there... and well, I guess my son still hasn’t learned how to read just yet… (For those who don’t know Malay, ‘alas kaki’ means doormat).

Now what does this story have to do with this blog post?

Absolutely nothing.

Well, it’s a cute story… ok, there’s a slight relation to this post… but the doormat I’m referring to is actually the type of person…

I have a friend, who shall remain nameless (just because she’s a doormat, doesn’t mean I have to step on her as well). She has a problem saying no. Now don’t get any ideas… she won’t sleep with you… err… I think. Anyway, no matter how she’s inconvenienced, she will not say no. There was a time when a total stranger came up to her in a bookstore. Chatted with her for a while and asked for her number. She did not want to give it. After all, she was at the bookstore with her boyfriend. It’s kinda inappropriate. Plus, the guy wasn’t ‘interesting’… but, being the doormat that she is, she says ‘ok… it’s 01x-xxx xxxx’. Then runs back to her boyfriend to tell him what happened.

At least she’s honest.

I do believe there’s a limit to being ‘a nice person’. You have to be able to draw your line. I know of several people who have stayed in abusive relationships, both physically and mentally, just because the other person tells them to stay.

I can’t say that it’s easy to break free of being a doormat… I’m one myself… there are just times when I would ‘take one for the team’… kind of funny how it’s always the same person who ‘takes one’.

I guess it’s a self-esteem issue. You’re overcompensating for your so called ‘inadequacies’. By giving in, you feel that the other person will appreciate you more, even with your ‘flaws’… sad isn’t it?

Amazingly, I don’t have any advice to give… I’m a doormat myself. But if you don’t love yourself, why would anybody love you?

T-H-E E-N-D…. dah abis....